Leaving our hectic life in London for a fresh start 160 miles away has left me with no choice, but to resign from my Front of House Administrator’s position @ one of Hilton’s family hotels back in London.Travelling from Staffordshire to London for work would be simply impossible – it’s too far away (or I don’t get paid enough to cover travelling costs ha ha). It means, I won’t be coming back to my working place, where I spent the whole past 5 years. No denying, was a big part of my life- with ups and downs, but I loved it regardless.
I have already resigned from my position at the beginning of this month and I am now officially unemployed (I hate to say this) or FULL-TIME MUMMY in other words. It took some time to get used to the thought and I actually feel pretty devastated. I am already missing it. 🙁
It feels very strange knowing, that I will be unemployed for God knows how long. We have no one around to look after children, so I will have to wait for Harry to get old enough to start the nursery and only then I can start looking for a job again. Do I feel happy? Strangely not extremely. As much as I love my children and enjoy spending time with them, I often feel, that I also miss adult’s company during the day. I love my babies more than anything in the world, but I feel that this time at home is slowing down my personal development.
I am scared, that in the long term I will become one of those mums, moaning about someones shoes put in the wrong place, plate in the sink and not in a dishwasher or eating biscuits in a living room (I already complain about all of these actually 😀 ). I desperately need to get out of the house ha ha.
But if you think, that I am bored at home, you are very wrong. My day is as busy as it can get. Looking after 3 children it’s a hard job itself. Cleaning, laundry, feeding, putting to sleep. The only break throughout my day that I have is when Daniella and Harry are both asleep, I then make a cup of tea for myself and either work on my blog (it’s not only about writing posts or many technical issues to fix as well), or on another project of mine, that requires more of my time, than I normally have. My head is buzzing with ideas, but I can never find enough time to make them live. 🙁
Sooner than I realise, Daniella and Harry are up from their afternoon nap again, Luka is back from school and it’s then time to prepare dinner. Then Edward comes back from work, we eat and the day is nearly over.
I punish myself for not going out enough during the week. But I am just so panicky, that something will remain undone (one of those obsessed mummy symptoms). Or that my little project (that one day hopefully might turn into some additional income) will remain neglected. But (once again) I miss some adult talk. I miss seeing people, dressing up and going out to work. I honestly really hope, that my unemployment won’t last for long. Once Harry is a little older, mummy will start searching for a new job. 🙂